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But I don't understand why people think it's OK to shamelessly put down other women who are taller or bigger than I am.Every "amazon" and "giant" these men compare me to — they are PEOPLE. So when men reassure me that I'm not "too tall," it isn't flattering — it's infuriating.While some people find that their height doesn't impact dating at all, others may feel that it allows for judgment, fetishization, and stereotyping.
One even said explicitly, "I feel so manly with you." It's sort of been a firsthand exercise in how a lot of guys associate traits they see as childlike with femininity — they equate my height with an overall smallness, and that then makes them feel "big," playing into a traditionally desirable gender binary and power structure between men and women.It's a part of myself I've fought, manipulated, resented, and struggled to embrace for over half of my life.So when people inevitably criticize me for taking men's comments about my height too personally, I'm the first to agree. And I haven't worked this hard to love my body for some guy to nonchalantly tell me how to feel about it over a gin and tonic.The root cause of all that self-consciousness is that toxic masculinity garbage that makes us believe the taller you are, the "manlier" you are, and the better you are.Chaya: I remember being teased for being short in middle school, as my girl friends had their puberty growth spurts and I stayed the same from sixth grade until forever.